Edited 1st Nov: This post inspired Gaurav of Gauravonomics to make his own post (An Open Invitation), got itself an entry on DesiPundit (Love wanted all over the place), DesiBlogging (Ailments are the New Aphrodisiacs) and also made the “Hot Topic” Desicritics list. Oooh, ahhh.
And I bet it’s only because I used the word “mate” 
Links/trackbacks to all the above articles in the comments section.
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Why do I need a loving mate you ask? I’ll tell.
It’s because I have morning sickness.
Well, not the kind that a woman gets when she is with child (mercifully). Rather it’s the achoo-ing variety.
This is what happens. I get up. I sneeze. Then I sneeze again. And again. And again. And it continues. And continues.
Once, as an experiment, in-between sneezes I counted. I stopped at 22 (or was it when my tissue ran out? I can’t be sure right now).
And this is not on most mornings. It’s not on some mornings. No, it’s every morning.
Finally, I have decided to be proactive. I have now stacked up on a dozen toilet rolls (I find them more sneeze-absorptive than regular tissue paper).
I have also looked up online for a cure to my problems. One site tells me “Morning sneezing or “hay fever” … is so common that people often pass it off for normal. It is not. No one should wake up in the morning and sneeze for the first hour or so.”
Damn. Just when I thought I was like everyone else. And what’s this about hay? I never rolled in the hay with anyone. I never made hay while the sun shone. Heck, I’m a city girl; I’ve never even seen hay. Oh well maybe once, during a Christmas play, when I was the donkey at the manger scene.
Back to the net, one site tells me it’s season related. Yet another one assures me it’s not.
Most others agree it has something to do with pollen. A ‘Dr. Fink’ (love his name!) says “The most common inducers are pollens, molds, dusts, animals, and mites” The only way I know to get rid of all that from the air I breathe is to move out of Mumbai.
After all, “a recent study by the Environmental Pollution Research Centre (EPRC) found that about 10% of the population of Chembur suffers from bronchitis and respiratory distress caused by pollution”. Not that I stay in Chembur, but I could have (& just imagine my state then!).
I’m an avid & loyal netizen (I always Google before I call my doctor) and I know & love the internet for this reason - you can always find something to prove your point, to say what you want, to justify your stance. No matter how wrong, stupid or unjustified you may be.
I finally find what I’m looking for - Dr. Grossan states his case (& mine) most eloquently: “Do you have morning sneezing and hacking? For this you take breakfast in bed!”
(Wait, there’s more)
“In sleep the body temperature is lowered and the cilia that defend the body do less work, so the dust accumulates. On awakening, the body wants to get rid of that dust and at the same time warm the body. So, especially if one is allergic, the person sneezes and coughs. This certainly warms the body but then a “cascade” starts that is hard to stop. So, to avoid morning sneezing, have hot tea before you get out of bed. This can be from a Thermos or a hot plate, or a loving mate.”
I’m not really a tea person. But I do love the idea of breakfast in bed – so will settle for hot coffee to warm me up.
And that’s why I need the loving mate, to go fetch. I promise you, my health depends upon it.
(PS: If you think I’m lying, because sometimes I do, check up on Dr Grossan here!)
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October 30th, 2006 at 4:09 pm
God bless you, Melody! Some 22 times at that
And, did I get the GOLD? Did I? Did I??
October 30th, 2006 at 4:49 pm
Hey Wonderful blog ! Nice way of expressing yourself
I am from Bangalore ! Care to share more abt you?
Reg morning sickness - you can have hot water 2 glsses before you sleep. Try Having a towel on top of your pillow cover.
Get more sun light into your room during the day
regards, pat
October 30th, 2006 at 4:56 pm
ahaan 2 posts !!!
every morning there’s a competition in our house….between hubby n me……achooo…achooo…achoooooooo
October 30th, 2006 at 4:57 pm
hey just noticed ur blog roll………thanks for linking Me !!!
October 30th, 2006 at 9:14 pm
thank you !!!
i always said toilet paper rolls are wayyyy better than tissues !!
i feel so happy
October 30th, 2006 at 9:40 pm
Someones posts are getting all “interesting” lately…
BTW, you’ve been tagged
October 30th, 2006 at 10:16 pm
My doctor once told me that if I read every medical advice on the internet, I will end up believing half of it. And in which case I need not visit him. His advice was to meet him and then to look up what I told him rather than self-medicate.
October 30th, 2006 at 10:47 pm
Hey Mel, interesting post n all, but i have a few Qs…
1 - Does it happen outside of ur house? At a friend’s place? If you’re staying in a hotel? (I’m hinting at some allergic reaction to your bed linen etc. - happens to me sometimes. Avoid woollens and try thick cotton instead.)
2 - Overhead fan? Have the A/C on? Try switching off. I wake up with a headache sometimes if the fan is on!
3 - Drink water before going to bed? Try having *hot* water instead - before going to sleep and once u wake up - preferably with honey (and optionally, ginger).
Basically experiment with different things around u. I think you’re just allergic to pollen or dust particles. And it’s not a surprise in Mumbai (or Bangalore or any other city).
Lemme know!
- Your friendly neighborhood blogger shrink
October 30th, 2006 at 11:08 pm
@ Pat: Thx. Know about the sunlight thing, am trying.
@ Mehak:
lol to you & the hubby. Perhaps you could get each other breakfast in bed in turns so that at least one of you is ok at all times??!
And dear, I put the link up ages ago!
@ inexile:
Glad to see someone else uses toilet rolls too. Sometimes I carry them in public. My high-fundoo friends pretend they don’t know me…
@ Ajay: Whaddya mean LATELY???!! And oh-no, not a tag.. arrrggg. I hate memes!
@ Ashish: You know what? I totally hate going to my doctor. I actually am such a procrastinator when it comes to seeing a medic… somehow I try everything else I can first. My doc usually yells his head out at me but, no effect yet. Know what you’re saying is right, but somehow… Sigh. Still the idea of breakfast in bed is so good, who care if it doesn’t cure my morning sneezes. At least I’ll be pampered!
@ Kaushal: Wow. I don’t think my doc asks me so many questions! Thx for the concern!
“experiment with different things around u”… okey
sounds fun !!
October 30th, 2006 at 11:47 pm
Breakfast in bed sounds like an very nice idea. However, if I suggest it, I will end up taking it to the wife rather than the other way around.
October 31st, 2006 at 2:59 am
The ‘loving mate’ cures other ailments too. I have found that I lose weight when I’m dating someone.
October 31st, 2006 at 8:26 am
@ Gaurav: Well, if there be side effects, so be it … I was looking out purely for health reasons as I stated
October 31st, 2006 at 12:56 pm
Mel, Most common reason for morning sickness or itching while in the bed is due to so many micro- bed -insects which you may not able to see with your naked eyes. We dont wash the bed linens frequently. They enjoy breeding further on the warm , moist ( because of sweat) etc
bed sheets, pillow covers. If you change your pillow covers once in 3 days you will get better results. You may consider my idea as idotic one but my intution says strongly that you are one care so much about your friends and not so much about your self.
October 31st, 2006 at 5:57 pm
adding to what Par says: It’s actually mites. change your pillow. Then try changing ur sheet every day and pillow covers too. Mites are found in all beds. They are a species that live on our dead skin cells. And we are allergic to their droppings. Not the mites themselves.
November 1st, 2006 at 12:03 am
This was definetely not a medicy (just made up that word!) post… DO NOT BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU READ HERE!!!
Thx for the concern though.
@ All: -> No more medical advice anyone. Thx all!
November 1st, 2006 at 12:28 am
I think you got enough advice but no one wants to be your loving mate.
So I am here……and I make good tea
and you have very interesting blog…..
November 1st, 2006 at 11:18 am
How are you with getting coffee in the mornings? […]
November 1st, 2006 at 11:19 am
LOL! Reminds me of Freakonomics! LOL…perhaps you should write a book now…Melody’s solutions to everyday Maladies!
And hey btw that “esoteric” post has no connection to my personal life - just one of those random inexplicable thoughts that wander in.
November 1st, 2006 at 11:56 am
melody’s maladies of the melodious melodies of melody’s maladies !
November 2nd, 2006 at 12:41 am
darn u, it was all satirical? so u just got us dwarfs concerned for nothing? shame on u Snow White! no apples for u.
November 2nd, 2006 at 10:16 am
That’s a very interesting post, but lemme tell u that you
will not get rid of hay fever and pollen allergies by moving out of
mumbai ( tho it is indeed terribly polluted).
I know lots of ppl who live in rural america ( & breathe
far cleaner air than us) who get it.
November 2nd, 2006 at 1:30 pm
hey.. you still have the coupon!!
November 2nd, 2006 at 2:35 pm
@ Alex: “Melody’s solutions to everyday Maladies!” I like it! I should write a book!
And good to know the post was not connected to your personal life. Was beginning to get worried there for my Alexis…
@ inexile:
@ Kaushal: No apples… darn. They really are my favorite fruit…
@ Ana: I said no more medy advice!!
@ Khush:
One of these days I may use it too… he’s looking better and better everytime I see him!