The Voice In My Head…

Edited 1st Nov: This post inspired Gaurav of Gauravonomics to make his own post (An Open Invitation), got itself an entry on DesiPundit (Love wanted all over the place), DesiBlogging (Ailments are the New Aphrodisiacs) and also made the “Hot Topic” Desicritics list. Oooh, ahhh.

And I bet it’s only because I used the word “mate”

Links/trackbacks to all the above articles in the comments section.
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Why do I need a loving mate you ask? I’ll tell.

It’s because I have morning sickness.

Well, not the kind that a woman gets when she is with child (mercifully). Rather it’s the achoo-ing variety.

This is what happens. I get up. I sneeze. Then I sneeze again. And again. And again. And it continues. And continues.

Once, as an experiment, in-between sneezes I counted. I stopped at 22 (or was it when my tissue ran out? I can’t be sure right now).

And this is not on most mornings. It’s not on some mornings. No, it’s every morning.

Finally, I have decided to be proactive. I have now stacked up on a dozen toilet rolls (I find them more sneeze-absorptive than regular tissue paper).

I have also looked up online for a cure to my problems. One site tells me “Morning sneezing or “hay fever” … is so common that people often pass it off for normal. It is not. No one should wake up in the morning and sneeze for the first hour or so.”

Damn. Just when I thought I was like everyone else. And what’s this about hay? I never rolled in the hay with anyone. I never made hay while the sun shone. Heck, I’m a city girl; I’ve never even seen hay. Oh well maybe once, during a Christmas play, when I was the donkey at the manger scene.

Back to the net, one site tells me it’s season related. Yet another one assures me it’s not.

Most others agree it has something to do with pollen. A ‘Dr. Fink’ (love his name!) says “The most common inducers are pollens, molds, dusts, animals, and mites” The only way I know to get rid of all that from the air I breathe is to move out of Mumbai.

After all, “a recent study by the Environmental Pollution Research Centre (EPRC) found that about 10% of the population of Chembur suffers from bronchitis and respiratory distress caused by pollution”. Not that I stay in Chembur, but I could have (& just imagine my state then!).

I’m an avid & loyal netizen (I always Google before I call my doctor) and I know & love the internet for this reason - you can always find something to prove your point, to say what you want, to justify your stance. No matter how wrong, stupid or unjustified you may be.

I finally find what I’m looking for - Dr. Grossan states his case (& mine) most eloquently: “Do you have morning sneezing and hacking? For this you take breakfast in bed!”

(Wait, there’s more)

“In sleep the body temperature is lowered and the cilia that defend the body do less work, so the dust accumulates. On awakening, the body wants to get rid of that dust and at the same time warm the body. So, especially if one is allergic, the person sneezes and coughs. This certainly warms the body but then a “cascade” starts that is hard to stop. So, to avoid morning sneezing, have hot tea before you get out of bed. This can be from a Thermos or a hot plate, or a loving mate.”

I’m not really a tea person. But I do love the idea of breakfast in bed – so will settle for hot coffee to warm me up.

And that’s why I need the loving mate, to go fetch. I promise you, my health depends upon it.

(PS: If you think I’m lying, because sometimes I do, check up on Dr Grossan here!)

So this is the first time I’ve heard about Tailranks. So what? It was the first time I’d met many of the “A-listers” too (Gaurav, still not saying your conversation excerpts were true).

Anyway for those of you as smart as I am, Tailranks is apparently a memetracker which tracks the “hottest posts on the blogosphere” & also is one of Time.com’s Top 50 Coolest Sites. Yes, I am suitably blah-ed.

Now you know why I attend blog meets. (not)

Halloween’s a sudden BOO!!
And just as quick a scream:
Laughing in the scary dark,
Loving friendly fright.
On Halloween, witches come true;
Wild ghosts escape from dreams.
Each monster dances in the park,
Eating candy like a shark-
Now kiss and say goodnight!
(c) Nicholas Gordon

Sure, halloween’s not until a couple of days but that shouldn’t stop anyone from having a good halloween party.

But truth be told, it was actually a Blog-o-Ween party. Not the average run-of-the-mill bloggers get together. No siree bob! When bloggy A-Listers get together (along with the man who “defines the list”) don’t just expect coffee and cake.

Expect a theme (Halloween, of course, you d-uhs).
Expect a three course meal.
In a fancy home.
In a neighbourhood probably better known for Govinda & Vivek Oberoi.
Expect the bubbly hostess-with-the-mostess Sakshi to be prancing about (much like Santa’s reindeer)
You can even expect some people to get dressed up for Halloween (though most wore jeans, spoilt sports, tsk tsk).

What one probably wouldn’t expect though - I sure didn’t!! - is the primary conversation of the night to be centered around… Bollywood. huh? Where was all the intellectually stimulating conversation I had prepared myself for?

Unlike the (most-part) of the last bloggers meet I went to - this was not one where bloggers got together and discussed blogs, techy things related to blogs & miscellaneous things on the net.

It was more a meeting of friends who were chilling out together, laughing at stories of 6′ tall big hulking black (oops, African American) men speaking Hindi, about telling a man’s character by the way his hand comes out of a door (nothing Halloweeny about that, no, it’s all good), about men holding men’s (ok just Gaurav’s) hands and about Bollywood.

Lots and lots about Bollywood.

Of course when I say Bollywood, I mainly mean the actors. And the gossip. About who’s dating whom. Who’s run over whom. Who’s whose landlord.

Bloggers. They never cease to surprise me.

And just in case you’re wondering about the title of this post - apparently I’ve done it again. Gone and earned myself another Mandira title. Though this time it’s not because any of them thought I looked like her.

No, it was more of the “Don’t wear bustiers and then give your gyaan” angle. Though I wasn’t. Really I wasn’t. Really, I tell you. Darn. Why bother.

Posing for the “can you really tell our character by looking at our hands?” competition

By now, all present have gotten their blogs updated with their versions of what really happened. Just goes to prove that an elephant isn’t really an elephant until you’ve seen him from every angle.
(01) Peter Griffin - abolishes the myth that bloggers do not get invited to parties.
(02) Manish Vij - with “Must See” pics of the party!!
(03) Anand Agrawal - finally gets writing again!
(04) Amit Varma - spilling some beans on private things discussed at the party.
(05) Sakshi Juneja - hostess’ version
(06) Saket Vaidya - slightly sozzled version of the meet
(07) IdeaSmith - with interesting one liner descriptions on all present
(08) Gaurav - includes one conversion excerpt that never happened
(09) Divya - southie-styled version
(10) Akshay

Road, that is.

If you’ve read today’s papers, you will already know about the water pipeline that burst in the middle of last night. It was a terrible ordeal for all the residents of Hill Road but not a shock - and I quote (the Mirror) “According to traffic police sources, the road witnesses a flow of approximately 30,000 vehicles every day, while it was meant to cater to not more 8,000 vehicles.”

I heard first hand accounts about the “loud bang” in the night - louder than the post-diwali/present-id crackers. About the water that flooded the roads worse than the rains. About the noise that ensued.

And of course, about the traffic jams the next morning (today) because of only one lane being available for station bound traffic.

I took a round myself (bravo Mell!!) to see the scene of the crime as it were. And it was not a pretty sight. There it was, gaping for all to see, with red & white cordon lines flapping in the wind.

And of course, nothing was being done about it. No one was even around. No water guy people. No road people. No traffic people. Just lots of rickshaws all around. And lots of normal fed-up-how-much-can-we-take-of-this people.

See my pic below and compare it to the pics in the Mumbai Mirror (edit: have had to take out the link as it no longer points to the same page). It looks like the “authorities” just did some stuff and then dumped all the earth back over the hole:

(Click to enlarge)

In other news, since I was going to Hill Road, took another friend of mine who wanted buy some sexy lingerie from earlier mentioned store. Am sure the dude thinks I’m a pimp (or is it madam ?) now because I keep bringing other women to his store to buy fancy feathery thingies.

Edited: Thursday 26th October
Just found out that the WHOLE of Hill Road is going to be dug up (they’ve already started at the end of Hill Road; the area going up to Mount Mary’s) as the entire water pipe is going to be replaced. So almost everyone in Bandra, at some point or the other, will now have to bear the brunt of another integral mainstream road being dug up.

Never let it be said that my friends are normal. After all, would a normal group of people go out all together to celebrate one friend’s birthday on another friend’s birthday? (if you’re interested, we’re probably celebrating the first friend’s birthday close to when the second friend’s birthday will be). And all this when both said friends are present. Weird, huh? Well.

The friend whose birthday it was not, but whose birthday we were celebrating asked me to choose where we’d go for dinner. I choose Barbeque Nation at Pali Hill, Bandra. It had opened mid-January this year & somehow or the other I’d not gone there yet.

The ambience of the place is very lounge bar-ish and I was pretty impressed even before tasting the food. There’s an indoor (with AC) and an outdoor section (with ambient street noise). Tables need to be reserved in batches (i.e. before 8.30pm or after 10.30pm).

The food is excellent, so says moi, an ardent lover of meat. This is the type of place to go with a group of friends (it’s not a sweet little nice romantic place, no way) - after all it is an all-you-can-eat place priced at INR 400 a head (+ taxes which works out to around 450ish).

The way it works it this - first they stuff you with starters - and when I say stuff I say stuff. Oh my dear gluttony stomach!!! (Dev, shut up).

There were Lamp Chops, Kebabs of every kind (yes on skewers), Shrimps (simply divine!) and my personal favorite - the Lebanese Mushrooms. The center of the table was scooped by our so-oh-perfectly-efficient waiter Pawan (seriously we were so badly behaved that I told him it was my first time in a restaurant) to add a grill so we could skewer our own meat and re-heat anything if we wanted.

By the time we got through the snacks, I was already full (am not a buffet person) and so were many at the table. One particular person (who shall remain unnamed) was lounging about almost horizontally on the bench!! We had a very convenient corner for our group, so we could (and did) behave terribly, laughing loudly at the most inane & stupid jokes (ok fine, many of which I cracked - what would K* be called during WWII? hehe).

After (or in between) all the meats, we had some soups, mine was mushroom cream & was delicious. I was pretty wasted by this time and actually skipped the main course (told you I was not a buffet person) because (a) I was full and (b) nothing really interested me. There was biryani and some pasta and some bakes and seriously, I’m going for desserts.

Desserts turned out to be hot gulab jamuns (great!), kiwi soufflé, another soufflé (listen I was too full to remember the names) and some vanilla ice-cream with fruits and sauces. Must mention that one girlie in our group ate ALL the fruit at the counter.

And if that doesn’t convince you how badly behaved we were, there was another girlie drunk on laughter and life who was busy twirling the little cocktail umbrellas around. Pawan very sweetly obliged the silly creature by bringing her more umbys when required.

Oh yes, and I did organize a cake for both my friends to cut. I was waaay too full and waaay too drunk to take any more confusion about whose birthday it was or not. Have a good year ahead you guys.

4th place, yes. But honestly after that race, no one, not a single one person can doubt that Schumi was, is and will always be a champion. That he doesn’t give up. Ever. Even if it meant going side-by-side just inches apart from Kimi Raikkonen to get into 4th place.

By that time I would have honestly settled for Schums to beat Button & just get onto the podium. It honestly didn’t make sense to me for him not to be there. If anyone deserved to be on that podium it was him.

All that aside though, it was one fabulous race. If Schumi had to go, this is the way fans around the world appreciate him going, fighting to the very very end. Not to mention, getting the fastest lap of the race. Schums we will always love you.

Back to F1 however, the end of the race seemed like the end of an era. An era where the man in red no longer raced. And where the reigning (back to back!) man in blue no longer will race for blue. And where the man on the top of the podium is wearing… a flag??

Seriously Massa, love your energy, your passion for your country, the way you couldn’t stand still for half a milli-second after winning. It’s like everyone forgot Alonso was the new champion of the world. Or that Schumi would no longer be among them. Or perhaps, like me, they just didn’t want to remember.

(SRK’s house is all lit for Diwali)

There is an indefinable mysterious Power that pervades everything.

I feel It, though I do not see It.

It is this unseen Power which makes Itself felt and yet defies all proof,
because It is so unlike all that I perceive through my senses.

It transcends the senses….

That informing Power or Spirit is God….

For I can see that in the midst of death life persists, in the midst of untruth, truth persists, in the midst of darkness light persists.

Hence I gather that God is Life, Truth, Light. He is love.

He is supreme good.

But he is no God who merely satisfies the intellect
If He ever does.

God to be God must rule the heart and transform it.

– M. K. Gandhi
(Young India, October 11, 1928)

Wishing all my Hindu and Muslim readers & friends a very happy diwali & eid mubarak.
May we all be blessed with a lifetime of truth and love.

It’s always an exciting time for us unworthy Mumbaites when certain Bangaloreans descend upon us and I had a great time with Ana, Sonu, DV, Geh & Prem.

Started off the night by going to DV’s office. When one says “office” people usually imagine drab work environment. Not so with DV. This brilliant young boy (& yes, he’s single, contact me if you’re interested!) has bought off three entire floors of a building (in Dadar) and is slowly working on expanding his kingdom by buying off the whole building, one by one.

While I’m not quite sure what type of evil mastermind he may be, one thing is for sure… his office rocks We had a great time hanging out in his private office after long grand tour of all the floors and after much discussion on whether it was better to have a party on his terrace in the afternoon or in the night. We may just have to try both options and see which works

At one stage (in between everyone’s adulations to DV) I told DV I’d happily marry him after seeing the office. Of course, was promptly taken to task by Sonu who told me to “stop being fickle”. Ok then!

From DV’s to Phoenix, it was off to Spaghetti Kitchen to eat din dins. Have been there before (see partial review here) and it’s always been pretty good.

This time too the food was good. I totally recommend the Chicken Tetrazzini (was the best imo of all the dishes we ordered) and a thin crust pizza (which is light enough to have as an appetizer).

Of course, when it comes to dessert, I have to say I was FLOORED by the Kahlua Mousse… I could barely take this pic because everyone else at the table was digging in - I literally had to fight all off - see it devoured from all sides!

Had a good time (as usual with these ppl!) and missed the ones who were far far away from us. Will have to make some long distant trips in the near future

Firstly, thx to Ishimaru Chiaki, the Japanese beauty in Australia who called today to ask me why my blog hasn’t been updated…!! The last post was 4 days ago and I think that’s not too bad, ok?! Still it’s good to know some of you regularly check in. This is a post especially meant for the category in which it’s placed. Read on:

If you’re in Bombay city for a spot of shopping, you must take a trip down to the ‘Queen of the Burbs’ Bandra, Linking Road and Hill Road. And shop you can - for hours and hours - and for every single thing under the hot Indian sun.

Linking Road is lined up with all sort of fun stores filled with goodies. Salwar Kameez materials or ready pieces in all sorts of colors, patterns & work done on them. For foreigners looking to buy gifts to take home, I’d suggest the Kurtis. Alternatively you could pick up some really nice funky bags with bead/mirror work or really sexy fabrics (pretty similar to roadside shopping in Bangkok and a bit cheaper too if you can bargain).

Of course for me, Linking Road means shoes!!! It’s a shoe shopper’s heaven literally! If you’re like me and a tad fussy about picking up stuff from the roads, don’t worry - there are tons & tons of proper shops filled with shoes! You’ll even find shops that will make custom shoes for you - choose the pattern (you can even mix & match from different shoes) & tell the color & the height & voila!!

I suggest you take a full day out to go shopping (it’s completely worth it). There are also tons of fast food places you can stop & snack at including KFCs and McDonalds. I stopped at the latter when I spent my Sunday shopping & took this pic with good ole Ronald. I promise I wasn’t trying to be fresh or anything…. it was only after I saw the pic I realised why he was blushing bright red & turning his face away from me… erm… sorry, meant to just put my hand on your lap…

Back to shopping however, Hill Road is the place you can pick up a lot of nice Indian & Western clothes. Globus, Trios, Hilton and tons of other stores are stocked to capacity (both people shopping & clothes) with clothes for kids, adults, formal, informal, whatever you want stuff.

What we wanted though was some very fun lingerie. A close girl friend of mine is getting married in a two months & we decided to have a blast & check out some shops that we wouldn’t usually. And my, my, my. Oh my. There were stuff I didn’t even know what to use for. And there was other stuff which I could understand what to use for but couldn’t for the life of me figure out WHY anyone would want- like artificle “buttock pads to pad in your buttocks”. Are they on some JLo trip here???

All that aside though, we managed (& when I say we, I really mean my friend) to buy some really really fun stuff, full of feathers, strappy-thingies etc. We came out blushing slightly but thoroughly entertained, lol.

Back to the food - if you’re Indian or not too worried about falling sick, I suggest you try out the Pani-Puri at Elco Arcade, it’s so good that it’s rumoured the owner made enough money to send his son to Harvard! (Ask anyone from Bandra & they’ll swear this is the truth). I don’t know if that’s true, but I do know he’s now bought off a full floor of the building above the original store (& we all know what Bandra real estate costs) and started a restaurant there.

Some words of warning though:

* Both Linking Road and Hill Road are UNbelievably crowded. If you’re like me & can’t stand crowds then I suggest you try going there in the morning (but not too early as most shops open only by around 11am) and if possible, try going on a week day to avoid the added weekend rush.

* If you’re not Indian, take someone with you who’ll help you bargain. Most places require you to bargain even if you’re Indian. And if you’re obviously not, they’ll try to rip you off further. The exceptions to the “required-to-bargain” rule would be some of the bigger shops (like Globus), but I’ve found out even in some (other) big shops, if you’re buying a lot of stuff, you can bargain a little.

* Be prepared to walk a lot. Wear comfy walking shoes. The roads are in TERRIBLE condition. There are no footpaths. Even the roads are filled with people selling stuff on cloths spread out (including lots of fake but nice Indiany jewellery/belts). The roads are also filled with traffic moving in every direction possible, be aware this is not for the faint hearted!

All that being said though, if shopping’s the aim, you ain’t gonna be dissapointed. Have fun!!

Whatever your point of view, whomever you may support, whichever constructor you’re backing, the truth is - this year’s F1 has been full of surprises.

The biggest dissapointment to all die-hard F1 fans (including I’m sure, the most avid Schumi-haters) was Shums retirement announcement. After all everyone will miss the man that literally defined F1 in recent times, with seven (!!) championships to his credit. True, cutey Alonso did win the championship last year, but it’s also true that Shums is in fantastic form this year (#8 coming up?).

But all that aside, it’s been a season of rivalry at it’s best. Machine against Machine. Man against Man. And sadly as we saw at Suzuka, even Machine against Man.

Interlagos is only 9 days away. They say “He who laughs last, laughs best”

The question is - who will laugh last?